A fresh start to a New Year often comes with New Year’s Resolutions. We are determined to make change, but those determinations and goals often quickly fade. Does that sound familiar?
There are 3 reasons why resolutions fade:
1. The goals we are making are not in alignment with our highest values. We often make goals based on what we feel we "should" do vs what we would love to do.
2. The resolutions we make are not realistic and often unattainable, setting us up for failure
3. We are not exploring the underlying reasons to why we are not doing these things in the first place!
So, instead of a New Year’s resolution, consider a New Year’s “Resolvalution!” Instead of trying to commit to doing something, why not explore and find a solution to why you haven’t been doing it in the first place!
There are important questions that are necessary to explore in order to make lasting change. Most people when making New Year’s resolutions fail to succeed because they are not making the significant lifestyle changes that are necessary. It is essential to look at the underlying reasons to why we do or don’t do the things we are seeking to change and then do the hard work to change them.
For example, if your resolution is to cut out coffee, have you even asked yourself why you are drinking coffee in the first place? Do you drink it because you love it? Do you drink it because you are so exhausted in the morning you need it to wake up and get going? Do you drink it because you need an escape and break from work that is mundane or meaningless to you?
If you love it, why would you decide to take it out? If you drink it for energy, then what in your life is draining you and fatiguing you? What would you need to resolve and change in order to find the energy that already resides within? If you drink it because you need a pick-me-up from uninspiring work, then how can you make your job more meaningful and fulfilling?
If your resolution is to start exercising, have you even asked yourself why you haven’t been doing it in the first place? Is it because you hate to exercise? Is it because you don’t have the time? Is it because your exercise goals are too lofty?
If you hate the gym, then don’t resolve to buy a gym membership and workout 5 times a week! Find a form of movement you love to do and do it because you love it, do it for the pleasure and joy it brings you and for putting a smile on your face. If you are doing it for weight loss, have you resolved the emotional reasons behind why you gained weight in the first place? If you don’t have the time, have you reevaluated how you are planning your day and when you can realistically create time for a workout? If you don’t change your day and schedule it in, your resolution will fall short. If you stopped exercising because you can’t reach your intended goals, then have you asked yourself what is a reasonable and doable goal?
It is time to do this Resolution thing differently. It’s time to go through the back door. It is time to make the long lasting changes that only come from deep exploration, and an honest change to a lifestyle that isn’t serving you. It is not the easy door to open, but it is the one that will offer great insights, aha moments, growth, healing, and lasting resolve that will make a New Year’s resolution last for years to come.
Yours in health & vitality,